Best of 2009

#4 - Altar of Plagues - White Tomb

I'm very content with how diverse black metal has become over the years. There was a time when black metal was simply blasts with screams of satan mixed with the most primitive equipment possible all for the sake of being "true." Those days are gone. More and more bands are taking black metal as an influence and creating something unique and in the case of Altar of Plagues, profound. White Tomb begins blasting full speed ahead with a traditional approach but as time passes it deconstructs itself piece by piece until you find yourself lost and buried by the oppressive atmosphere. It's as if this album creates a void for the listener; an actual place to exist as the experience becomes less like listening to an album and more like being trapped in a horrible nightmare. White Tomb is an album to be listened to from beginning to end in darkness. Certainly not reasonable material for your gf's mix tape.

Best of 2009

#5 - Gorod - Process of a New Decline

Sometimes i feel like i'm getting somewhere as a guitarist, actually making some amount of forward progress, but then Gorod releases another album and that thought is quickly extinguished. Damnit Gorod... You don't even have the decency to post the full names of your band members so i can look up their life stories and worship them. The guitar work on Process of a New Decline is unbelievably expressive, making use of everything music theory has to offer. But, unlike a lot of other material in this genre it's actually fun to listen to. Tech death bands often sacrifice memorability for liberal amounts of wanking, and honestly Gorod is no exception. However, Gorod has an approach that i find incredibly attractive. The guitar leads are all really fun to listen to, taking advantage of major scales and runs based on classical composition. The percussion is equally impressive, transitioning fluidly from blasts to funky grooves. There's just so much material here, so many brilliant ideas, it seems impossible for a human being to come up with this amount of material in a lifetime, much less 2 years. Process of a New Decline is an incredibly ambitious offering from these guys and it's a work that should be respected by the entire music community.

Best of 2009

#6 - Nile - Those Whom the Gods Detest

Ever since "In Their Darkened Shrines" i've made sure to pay close attention to the work of Nile. I've always been fascinated by modern art that takes strong influence from ancient civilization. I think the interest comes from the brutality of those times. An individual life seemed so insignificant, faced with spiritual cleansing, disease, famine, all at the hands of a supreme deity, either in the from of a man or an illusion. Reality was brutal and life could be taken away from you on a whim. Nile capture this idea and deliver it accurately to the listener. Their bludgeoning execution would seem right at home in that sort of environment which is an odd thing to think about considering electric instrumentation wasn't around back then. Nile has been building upon each release from the start of their career, noting strengths and weaknesses and always comparing their sound to the embodiment of ancient evil, of death, of senseless destruction. Those Whom the Gods Detest is the product of that constant effort; it is their masterpiece in every quantifiable way. This album raises the bar quite high, but i'm confident Nile has a few albums to come that may raise the bar even higher.

Best of 2009

#7 - Ulcerate - Everything is Fire

With each passing year i encounter bands that beg the question "How many times can music redefine the word extreme?" Ulcerate answers the question with a resounding "As many times as we fucking like." This is a visceral offering of music with surgical precision, face melting speed, and abundant discordance capable of making ones skin crawl. On first listen the delivery seems relentless, too chaotic to swallow at times, completely overwhelming, but given time and patience the chaos that was driving you insane starts to become memorable. Once this material begins to germinate in your skull it invades you with infectious groove and layered composition. If you choose to give this a listen, be patient, be open and run through it a few times. I can almost promise the appreciation will come.

Best of 2009

#8 - Katatonia - Night is the New Day

This was a year of progressive music with lots of bands breaking the rules of traditional song structure. Katatonia released this album toward the end of the year and completely ruined the progressive theme. Night is the New Day is the accessible album of the year. Katatonia's style has evolved over the years into something that should be very attractive to the masses. Gone are the days of harsh vocals and 8 minutes tracks. This collection of songs is emotionally charged and memorable. Each track sounds like it could be the single of the album and i thought that on the first listen and each subsequent listen. The only track that really stands out as different from the rest is the final track, and only because of the guest vocalist, which was a bold move for the closer but ultimately satisfying. I remain hopeful for the day Katatonia is played on the radio, but i'm certainly not holding my breath...

Best of 2009

#9 - Process of Guilt - Erosion

This is the first of a few down-tempo death/doom albums that made it onto the list this year. I had not heard of Process of Guilt before, but i'm glad i finally discovered them. This is one hell of a dark album. The atmosphere conveys an unrelenting sense of devastation with waves of massive guitar riffs and forward driving percussion. These musicians have a very well honed sense of tension and release that keeps this album surprising at every turn. With guitar riffs based on bludgeoning heaviness, i expected them to get boring and redundant, but it's the accompaniment that keeps them from repetition, namely the drumming, which was the most refreshing aspect of this album for me. They maintain a slow methodical pace, but manage to stay interesting with tension building fills reliant on the coming riff to resolve them. Erosion is a great example of how relatively simple pieces can come together and create something really extraordinary. Erosion is patient, it's brooding, it's unsettling and easily one of the best albums of the year.

Best of 2009

#10 - Wodensthrone - Loss

There's a lot of boring black metal out there; Black metal bands that focus too much on the message they're trying to convey, and not enough on making interesting passages that keep the listener involved. Wodensthrone accomplish something really special on Loss. They remain loyal to most of the tried and true techniques of black metal: tremelo picking, blast beats, shrieking vocals, but present them in ways that seem fresh by layering them with heavy synth work, growling vocals, momentary Gregorian chant, acoustic passages etc. With these extra techniques one might assume the ultimate composition would seem bloated or cluttered, but not the case with Loss. The composition is tight and underneath all of the musical prowess lies pure emotion. It doesn't take the listener long to sink into the album and forget about comparisons to other black metal. Wodensthrone have created a classic of nature inspired black metal and hopefully they keep churning out music of this caliber in the years to come.

Movie: Spun

This was a fun trip. Apprently the film maker is a recovering meth head and created this movie to convey the idea of being "spun" to his audience. The filming style is shocking at first, but after a few scenes you forget completely about the odd delivery and sink into the story which is involving but fairly light. I sort of expected there to be really dark moments in the life of the drug addicted, but it was all fun even the arrests and explosions. I guess maybe that was part of the perception of being on meth, it's an upper so depression wasn't really included at all in the story. The characters ran about until they were arrested then ran about some more. Jason Schwartman's character was slightly unbelievable just because i don't think he would've been that successful with women. He didn't seem to have much going for him, but it threw some stunning female characters into the mix. Especially his ex-gf who found success while he was shitting away his life on meth; She was fucking beautiful, although only had one line. Overall a bunch of good performaces and it was nice to see Mickey Rourke again so soon after the Wrestler, really great actor. His character stole the show for me as the Cook. The only reason it gets a 4 and not a 5 is because i think the film maker had the opportunity to capture some real darkness with his delivery but kept it a little light and fluffy for my tastes.

4/5

Movie: Donnie Brasco

This is one of the mob classics i've neglected to watch over the years. I'm glad i finally got around to it. Johnny Depp and Al Pacino both put on spectacular performances. After seeing so many of this type of film the stories sort of all melt together, so it's important for a film like this to build realistic relationships between the characters and that's exactly what was accomplished. I thought Lefty's reaction to Donnie's outing as an FBI agent was unique in this sort of genre. He said simply "If it was going to be anyone, i'm glad it was him." Normally the character would go into a blind rage and set fire to everything in sight until either killing the accused or getting himself killed, but this was more real. It confirmed the fact that they were close on a deeper level than mob vs. FBI. They were like family, Brasco was Lefty's son, filling the void left by his actual son who spent all of his time with drugs. The only criticism i can think of is just that i didn't feel close to any other character in the movie. The focus never left Pacino and Depp, which was a little disappointing, but i understand that that's exactly why i felt so close to them. It took the entire canvas of the movie to portray those two characters. I think the only movie of this type that actually achieved building a generous handful of memorable characters is The Godfather, which is why it reigns supreme in this genre, for me at least.

4/5

Movie: The Wrestler

This was a good one. I've always been a fan of Mickey Rourke. Not really sure why, because i can't remember off the top of my head any roles that really stood out for him although i know there are quite a few. I always pictured him being exactly the way his character was portrayed in this film. A little delusional, a little off-balance, with obvious vices, but still just a good hearted dude. This was his opus in my opinion. Sure props go to Aronofsky, but the performances made this movie for me. Rourke and Tomei were unbelievable; unbelievably real. Tomei, it must be said is one of the most attractive actresses out there, she's aging beautifully and is really taking a lot of risks this far into her career. By risks i mean in the eyes of the up-tight. A person might say she's losing credibility with nudes scenes and trashy but colorful characters she's been undertaking, but they would be wrong. She's doing things with her career that take serious guts and i'm infinitely appreciative.
Enough about them though, the story was amazing, the script was natural and very well-written right up to the last scene, which was inevitable although made me feel legitimately lost. I didn't expect this to be as emotional as it was, but it packed some heavy punches. Awesome in every way, i can't think of a single criticism...

5/5

Movie: Extract

Mila Kunis my lord... What a perfect role for her. Perfect because she could get away with it. Any straight man with any fight left in him would stand in awe of her and give her anything she wanted. This movie uses that and builds a realistic character based on it. However, we don't don't see enough of her, we don't hear enough of her, and she throws away a lifetime of sociopathic behavior because she got caught and had some sex with... Jason Bateman... Unlikely. The movie was funny and the story was strong right up until the end when all the conflicts resolved entirely too easily. However, one specific detail stood out for me. One of the employees at the extract plant was in a grind band. So each time he was on screen he was wearing a different t-shirt, most notably Cephalic Carnage. I haven't even seen another cephalic carnage shirt in person. To see one in a wide release movie was just great. Thanks Mike judge. And thanks for casting Mila Kunis, but i want more from you next time.

3/5

Movie: 9

I had low expectations for this brought about by mediocre reviews and lack of popular appeal. I remember seeing the trailer for it about a year ago maybe and i liked what i saw but after hearing how it was criticized i placed it low on the list of priorities.
After watching it i understand why it wasn't well received. The production value of CG movies has become astounding. With funding giants like pixar and disney there's no lack of money to put top designers and hardware to task and create something remarkable visually. 9 didn't seem to have the same level of production value. It was a more modest offering in the world of CG as far as pure visuals are concerned. Specifically, the world in which the story took place seemed small and for a post apocalyptic setting, there could have been more going on that wasn't integral to the storyline. The visuals and architecture presented themselves only when they had an active role in the plot either as walking surfaces or minor physical challenges. I did like the darkness of the atmosphere and the recurrence of impending doom. It felt like a quirky video game i'd find myself enjoying thoroughly.
The story was relatively better than the production value, although not without flaw. The characters all seemed very simple and created for a specific purpose to advance the plot toward its conclusion. This means obvious protagonists and antagonists and fairly predictable decisions and actions from both. However, the characters conveyed human emotion surprisingly well. I felt sympathetic and wanted them to be safe and eventually end up the victors of the ultimate conflict which i'd rather not explain here.
There was one central theme that irked me at first, but was essential to the plot: The idea of the human spirit and the ability of the spirit to ascend somewhere. This story took a detour by way of an invention that projected parts of a human's spirit into rag dolls, which i thought was creative. This theme gave the characters a way to die without actually dying, so like i said, irksome because of my personal convictions but for the story, essential to create tension then relieve it with a nice happy ending SPOILED. The actual script wasn't terribly ambitious, but sharp and to the point, very little wasted time, which i appreciated for this type of movie.
So, overall, a modest, creative, quirky experience. One I enjoyed.

3/5

The more i think about it the more i'm convinced i have a pretty clear path for the next few years. Albany feels like another temporary residence. Although much more accommodating than Richmond, this city still doesn't have what i'm looking for. It still doesn't have an environment of intelligent cultured people. Maybe no city does, considering the more urban areas are polluted with pretention, but i remain hopeful. I remain intrigued by what it would be like to live in NYC and i feel that is my final destination after all this moving around. I want to exist there with a few musicians and thinkers. I'm not sure if that prospect includes still being employed by Bank of America. I'm sort of hoping it doesn't, but i would never take my job for granted considering how many people are struggling to find work at the moment. I'm also hoping that at some point in my life i could achieve my goals without having to be tied down to a job in which i provide no benefit to anyone. We'll see. I want to live in the city to meet people, to meet a girl; i'll just have to learn a few new skills to get there.

I am in Poughkeepsie again. I've been visiting a lot know there's not much time left to revisit my college years. Being here is like being at home, the streets i know, the people, the places to get food and drinks, some change, but each new business fills the temporary vacancy like it was there all along. Following the slight betrayal from an insecure girl i'm feeling somewhat motivated to go out and find another. They seem more willing here, not more willing to fuck, but more willing to talk, which is rare. The real world is full of people who would rather walk alone in their careers than chat with a friendly stranger. That phrase may even be fictional at this point understand how much distrust the media provokes out of us. TANGENTS TANGENTS. We'll see how this weekend plays out. At the very least i will enjoy the company, the friends i missed while in VA. And the weekends remaining are few, not sure what will relieve the tension and frustration after their gone. Maybe going back to the gym.

People are strange when you're a stranger
Faces look ugly when you're alone
Women seem wicked when you're unwanted
Streets are uneven when you're down
When you're strange
Faces come out of the rain
When you're strange
No one remembers your name
When you're strange

If you haven't seen californicaton, you should, it's a great show.

Talking every day with one of my 55 year old coworkers is making me feel like a juvenile delinquent. Whenever i think of something to talk about it winds up involving some illegal or questionable activity i take part in and this dude is straight laced beyond definition. He doesn't go above the speed limit, doesn't drink or smoke, doesn't partake in the most innocent of web surfing while at work (not even news etc...) He doesn't listen to music, so that kills about 75% of all possible topics of conversation with me. Most of the time when we talk he just gives me a lecture about something, which i don't mind. It's better than silence. But today he hardly spoke at all. I think it was deliberate to see if i'd fill the void, but i have enough trouble thinking up different acknowledgments to whatever he's saying. The venue for these conversations is four miles of sidewalk that takes the full lunch break to navigate. I enjoy the walk because i don't like being in the office, and i think i'm giving him a bit of motivation to exercise and lose some weight. He said since he's met me he's taken off 15 pounds, and i'm very happy for him. I just hope he hasn't run out of things to say, because an hour is a bit more awkward silence than i can bear.

The weekend. I went to NYC for a birthday party for three different girls. Two of which i knew very well, while one has always been either bashful of me or disgusted by me since i met her years ago. The day leading up to the party was spent in an outlet mall in NJ with Ali which was a good experience, except for the lack of a general dept store to get some sunglasses. Ali made out very well finding an interview dress at a ridiculous discount because she's not afraid to ask for well-concealed discounts and people love to interact with her, including me. It was a long day but my first drink at the bar was a red bull and vodka which set me straight. The rest of the night fades in and out of my memory, but i can remember one moment very vividly. I turned around and out of nowhere was standing matt hittenmark. A person i don't care about in the least bit because he always struck me as artificial; like he doesn't really have any taste or desire for anything, just drifting trying to be seen and heard. I wanted to slap him in the face for no particular reason, but i had a short polite conversation with him maintaining an interested smile and polite dimeanor. My skin crawled, but it was a party and i think he saw through me anyway. The rest of the night i was very drunk and remember smiling a lot. Mostly because i enjoyed being around Matt and Dan infinitely. They always look at me with an honest interested expression that i can't get enough of and they're the most honorable, respectful, fun people i've ever met. I don't remember the ride home. I just remember a question that was asked without an answer that was in fact the answer i was dreading. But, i know not to try again and know to prevent similar situations in the future.

One of my coworkers surprised me today. He was having trouble getting online this morning when i needed him for backup on a project. I called him up asking what was wrong and used a very polite, understanding tone even though i was nervous of being left in the cold. He managed to fix whatever was wrong and we talked on the phone for a bit more afterward. He said "i could hear you trying to be polite but i could completely tell you were screaming at me to figure it out and get your shit together so i didn't leave you alone on this thing" This is exactly what i was feeling and it was very perceptive of him to figure that out. It's rare that someone will call me out on something like that and say "you're full of shit, why don't you just say what you mean" so i guess i figured i had grown fairly skilled at expressing myself in whatever way i choose, independent of my real feelings. But, this may not be the case. My real opinions and intentions may be very obvious to everyone and i may come off as a liar in some cases.

Four guys walked past me today returning from a pizzeria. One said "nice hair" and the rest laughed. It reminded me of a time in Richmond when someone passed me walking out of the supermarket and said "fag" walking next to his girlfriend. This is a related topic because not only are my intentions easily seen through my ambiguous words, but my weakness is easily noticeable from my outward appearance. How else would these people know it's safe to make such harsh remarks to a fit 6'4" male.

Harsh realizations when i spend so much time trying to mask my true intentions and insecurities.

21 Best Metal Albums of the 21st Century... So Far

#1 - Cult of Luna - Somewhere Along the Highway

Here we are, at number one... But wait, how could i have picked this as the best album of the 21st Century so far when i already stated the #2 spot as being a perfect album...? I was stumped for a while too, but that was my list, that's what i felt, it was an instinct that took me this long to figure out and here is my explanation. I've spent a lot of time thinking about why i like music and all of the different attributes that combine into an idea of perfection. For me one attribute transcends all others and that is the idea of losing oneself in the music. When an album hits you so deeply that you forget you're listening to music, that you forget what makes music good or bad, that you get so engrossed by it, stand at the whim of it, it reaches beyond perfection. When you stand at the mercy of a band you can't tell them what you think of it, you're just along for the ride, and it's up to them whether they want to return you to cynical, pretentious consciousness or not. Somewhere Along the Highway is a perfect title for a journey that may or may not end, that you may or may not survive and i think it describes this album perfectly.

21 Best Metal Albums of the 21st Century... So Far

#2 - Akercocke - Words that Go Unspoken, Deeds that Go Undone

I hinted at themes before that i find most respectable in music: sense of humor, contrasting emotions, brutality, keeping a balanced flow over the course of an album. These attributes as well as others make my perception of perfect music and the idea of a perfect album has changed for me over the years. The first time i was exposed to Akercocke was after the release of Goat of Mendes. At the time they seemed way too weird and campy, but i kept them in mind. They left a very unique unexplainable mark on me, but i shrugged it off until the next effort. Then Choronzon, and the interest grew but it was still a vague yearning. I enjoyed the album but all it did was whet my appetite. So i waited, and as time passed my perception of perfect music started to solidify and i started to feel what i was looking for. With their next full length, Words that Go Unspoken, Deeds that Go Undone it was as if i found it. I wasn't expecting a band to give me exactly what i wanted, but Akercocke delivered on every front of my curiosity. My intense attraction to this album might be completely subjective, but i would hope, i would dream otherwise. I want this album to be studied, written about, talked about, listened to endlessly until people understand just how brilliant it is.